Outside the Box:
By Maul Steed, Darth Modeler
18. Miss Louisiana
Not Bad. I almost voted for her since she was from the id Boys’ home state. Her hips need work, but she is a good model. ‘Two-finger gap’ will help if you get my drift.
22. Miss Michigan
Nice, but you need to get the anatomy book out some more. If she’d had more pronounced or wild, flowing hair it could have helped, too.
23. Miss Minnesota
Not bad from the waist down…bad from the waist up. Did you mean for her to have the arms of an orangutan?
25. Miss Missouri
Nice model and nice snake things. Give her some hair and you’re one notch up even with the viper nips.
29. Miss New Hampshire
Flash Dance? Seriously. Not a bad model, just not sexy enough with those manly shoulders of hers.
32. Miss New York
Again, not bad from the waist down…bad from the waist up (I reeaaallllyy need to finish that Kelly tutorial, don’t I? ;)
34. Miss North Dakota
Not bad but the pose is pathetic.
35. Miss Ohio
She’d have been great for that Super Hero Love Doll Challenge Contest. The thought of animating her scares me.
37. Miss Oregon
She’s hot, there is no doubt…but why the hell didn’t you turn that edge in her arm where the delt and biceps meet? Doesn’t that catch your eye? Her hair looks kinda nappy, too. It is a good model, overall though and was a pubic hair away from making the A list.
39. Miss Rhode Island
Points for creativity, but I’d probably have to pass on that action if I saw it on the corner.
44. Miss Utah
She’s really quite good and I just was too lazy to include her in the A list. I’d love to see what you have planned for the animation. Give her a toy for her other hand. For me?
49. Miss West Virginia
Nice rack, but the boring pose, hips and butt ruin it for me. Give her a woman’s hips, round the bottom out some more, don’t make her chin so pointy and she makes the cut.
50. Miss Wisconsin
I’ve heard of ‘legs up to HERE’ but that’s a stretch in this case. Why didn’t you turn the edges at her waist? It really looks rushed, but I understand, Dude.
51. Miss Wyoming
Well I am a fan of the PPG and he did use a geodesic sphere. Can’t wait to see the skin!
59. Miss South Padre Island
Do the words ‘interesting pose’ ring a bell. Coulda been a contendah…
60. Miss Nantucket Island
You get an A for effort but still get kicked down to the minors for improper edges and a very weird face.
FINALLY…THE REALLY UGLY
Sike. Well, I’ve droned on long enough and have decided to spare you the more vertex-challenged of the submissions. I just can’t plod through it and I definitely don’t want to subject you to that kind of torture and abuse.
Keep an eye out for the skin contest and watch me gleefully embarrass myself and get my ass thoroughly kicked when I skin Traci. See, it doesn’t really bother me since I’m completely comfortable being pixel-challenged. You never know, though. A scanner is a WONDERFUL friend for the PC ;]
Thanks for competing, thanks for voting and most of all…thanks for being you.
- Paul Steed is a 3D artist for id Software. He's currently hard at work on Quake 3: Arena.
Credits: Thinking Outside the Box logo illustrated and is © 1999 Dan Zalkus. Thinking Outside the Box is © 1999 Paul Steed. All other content is © 1999 loonyboi productions. Unauthorized reproduction is strictly prohibited, so don't even try it. We've got really big guns, and we're ripped, baby.