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2, Issue 12
February 15, 2000
of a Gamer:
House of the Dead 2:
It's the Cheesiest!
exposure to horror movies began at a very early age. Remember
that scene in The Shining (the Kubrick version) where that
gross zombie woman comes out of the bathtub? That gave me nightmares
for years. And the sight of blood on screen makes my stomach turn.
But there is one type of horror movie that has never, ever scared
me. And that, my friends, is the zombie movie. I laugh in the
face of Night of the Living Dead, and also at any other
cheap B-movie knockoff of it. And that extends to video game knockoffs
of B movie knockoffs of good horror flicks.
House of the Dead 2
for the Sega Dreamcast is just that...a video game version of
a B movie. You can either play the game with a gun or with the
controller. At first I decided to play with the gun. The drawback
to playing with the gun was that it took a long time for me to
be able to aim, but I got the hang of it eventually. And shooting
off screen to reload actually makes it feel more, I dont
know, real, I guess.
As I expected,
there isnt much plot here. You are James, part of some type
of law enforcement operation, or maybe some private zombie hunter
ring. I dont know because, frankly, I wasnt paying
much attention. All I know is that I couldnt get over the
fact that James looks like one of the Baldwin brothers. Alec,
I think. As I played the game I began to realize that all the
male characters looked like some variation of the Baldwin brothers.
Im not too sure about the female characters, though. There
seemed to be enough of a difference in them so that I couldnt
narrow it down any actresses in particular.
Alec, I mean James, has to go to the library to meet G (maybe
short for G-man?). James pulls up in his car and to his surprise
he is accosted by zombies. I guess he didnt notice on his
way to the library that the entire city was burning and all the
citizens were undead. He enters the library, finds more zombies,
and G, who speaks his dying words.
for the first level has to be the dumbest thing Ive ever
seen. A giant headless body comes at you with an axe while a purple
gargoyle darts around the screen and flies at you. James thinks
aloud here: Maybe thats his brain! You know, theres
something to be said for leaving a game player to figure certain
things out for herself. Were not talking brain surgery here
(excuse the pun). As if thats not enough, youre also
given the bosss weakness, so theres absolutely no
guesswork involved. In the second level you learn that the name
of the bad guy is Goldman. If that doesnt strike terror
into the hearts of all humanity, Im not surprised.
bored with single player, so I grabbed a bud and played multiplayer.
We only had one gun and one controller, so we had to make do with
that. The thing with the controller is, theres actually
a sight! Now theres even less thinking to do: all you have
to do is put the site on your target and fire! And there I am
with my gun, with decent but not great aim. I got jealous, of
course, and we switched. Now I had the site and I was doing worse
than when I had the gun! Id gotten so used to just aiming
and shooting that I couldnt control my aim with the controller.
something about this game that I thought Id hate but discovered
I really liked. The game moves for you. You dont actually
have to make your way through the maze of the city to get to the
boss at the end of the level. As you progress, the game scrolls
for you, and you go in different directions depending on which
people you save from zombies. Save the girl, go left. Accidentally
shoot her, go right. Considering that I still get dizzy on occasion
and sometimes have trouble walking and shooting simultaneously
(a problem I face in real life as well), this is an amazing innovation!
All I have to do is shoot. I cant get lost no matter what
I do! All I have to do is be on the lookout for zombies to kill
and people to save.
plot of The House of the Dead 2 is dumb. And yes, the acting
is terrible. You dont have to think at all to play this
game. All you have to do is aim and shoot. You dont have
to figure out any puzzles. If youre a brainless slob, youll
love this game. Then again, if youre tired after a long
week of work and school, no longer have the brain capacity to
solve puzzles and navigate mazes, and just want to play a game
and relax, youll love this game. That was the case with
me. Sure, its the dumbest game Ive ever played, but
its so stupid that I just had to enjoy it.
actually enjoys this.
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